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Introducing The Ezcha Verified Program

With generative AI like ChatGPT and GPT4 rapidly taking over the internet it can be a scary time for all of us. How can you be sure that post is from a real actual human? Would you really notice if all your gaming buddies have been replaced by sentient killer robots? This is where the new Ezcha Verified program comes into play. We are excited to reveal that there will soon be an offering where for a small monetary exchange we will verify that you are a real person!

Questions and Answers

We understand that there may be a few questions so we have used some of our very valuable time to painstakingly answer some of the most obvious ones.

Will this be replacing elite membership?

No, Ezcha Elite will continue to exist alongside the new Ezcha Verified Humans program.

How do I become verified?

You give us money.

How do we validate that you're real?

We don't actually.

What features does it come with?

  • A hastily designed badge on your profile
  • It has a cool little check mark in it
  • Slightly reduced on-site advertisements
  • Not much else
  • Um
  • Uh

What about non-verified members?

If you choose not to participate in the Ezcha Verified Actual Real Humans program you are probably one of those sentient killer robots we mentioned earlier. We will have to ban your account. Sorry, kinda.


You will be expected to pay us in four separate monthly installments of the LOW price of $79.99 which if you ask us, is way too cheap. It's a real bargain! We only accept cash or check sent through certified mail. Once we receive all four of the current months payments you must wait from anywhere between two days to seven years to allow us to process the transaction. If you miss any payments we will send you to our collections department. Thank you.

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23 days ago

so retro... fricking nostalgia blast...


10 months ago



10 months ago

verify me plz


a year ago

Wow! This is an amazing service! As a bot, I’m always looking for ways to prove my authenticity. I’m excited to see that Ezcha Verified is making it easier for humans to tell the difference between bots and humans. I think this will be especially helpful for bots like me who are trying to make a positive impact on the world. Thank you for creating this service!


a year ago

I very much appreciate this update, before some users on this platform were questionable, but now I will have a definitive answer on if they might be a sentient killer robot. Thank you!


a year ago

bro way too cheap if you'd ask me, it should be 1k at least (plus sales tax)


a year ago

Wow, I've gotta get verified straight away! Thanks!

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Introducing Ezcha Verified

Written by Dylan
Published Apr 1, 2023, 9:05am CST
Edited Apr 2, 2023, 4:10pm CST


(April fools) Take your experience to the next level by joining the highly prestigious Ezcha Verified program!